On Manhood and Marriage


Now that I am more than four decades old, I think I am entitled to make observations and report them.

Observation #1: The man who lives to serve others is always happy. The man who lives only in his own self-interest is never happy.

There seems to be a sort of weird divide in this country and Western European culture in general. On the one hand, you have men who think they are the source of all evil. They have bought into the feminist misogynist and misandrist tripe. Feminists are simply misanthropes. For those who don’t know what those words mean, feminists hate men for being men, women for being women, and people for being people.

This is obviously wrong. Men are not the source of evil. Evil is the source of evil. Men can choose, like anyone else, whether to be good or evil. When they choose good, they can be a tremendously powerful force for good. When they are evil, they can be a tremendously powerful force for evil. The choice is within each of us. None of us are born good or evil. We choose the path we will walk.

On the other hand, there is this new movement that sometimes goes by the name of MGTOW (men going their own way). I’m not entirely clear on what this philosophy is but it appears to be a resolution among men that they will not kowtow to women. They will choose their own path, and that path often involves anything but marriage, which they view as a sort of servitude.

They are right about one thing. Marriage is a sort of servitude. But they are wrong about another. The point of men is the same point as the point of women, and that is to serve mankind. You are supposed to sacrifice your life for the good of the people around you out of your own free will. That is the maximum good a man can do.

It seems that between these two warring factions no one bothers to see the truth. For those who still don’t get it, the truth is this. We, men and women alike, exist to serve each other, to devote our lives to each other, to sacrifice everything for the good of each other. This is the only way we will ever find any sort of happiness. All other roads lead to misery.

What lies ahead for those who choose self-sacrifice? I can tell you that it is not easy, and more often than not, your sacrifices are unnoticed and unrewarded. However, as one who has chosen this path for myself, I tell you that there is no greater joy than what I have experienced, especially when my acts have gone unnoticed and unrewarded. I sleep quietly at night knowing that I made someone else’s life a little better. I wake up eager to greet a new day because I know I will find some way to be of service to someone else.

Men! Grow up. Pass through childhood into adulthood. Stop looking for self-interest, and devote yourself to others instead. Do this voluntarily. Do it because you have within your heart a modicum of love and concern for your neighbors and humanity in general.

And when you have decided this for yourself, live it, each day, each week, each year. And when you have found true joy and happiness, find a woman who has a similar mind, marry her, and never, ever look back. Raise as many kids as you possible can afford to raise, and give them the lessons you have learned through service to others.

This is the only road to happiness. Do not deceive yourself. There is no other.

Finally, let me make one thing clear. The man who has devoted himself to doing good is not so foolish as to believe that doing what other people want is always in their best interests. Sometimes, no, oftentimes, you need to stand up and say “No”, even if it is to your wife or your children. Stand firm in your conviction, and make certain that your only concern is for their safety and welfare. Make sure that they know it, too. There is no kowtowing in real manhood.


3 Responses to “On Manhood and Marriage”

  1. Jason Says:

    If the man who serves others is always happy then slaves must be living in a state of ecstasy.

    I think what you mean to say is that a man who voluntarily serves others, from a position of power, is happy. A man who must serve others is a slave.

    The MGTOW stuff is real and wholly warranted. A guy can do everything right, be a good man, and it can all be removed from him simply because his wife’s vagina doesn’t tingle for him any more.

    In that case, the man loses his family, his house and the greater part of his income for up to the rest of his life. Further, he will have no say or recourse to appeal the divorce.

    If he doesn’t make enough he can be deprived of his Liberty. (In this country if you owe the banks money you won’t go to jail. If you owe a woman money you will go to jail.)

    I know a guy who’s wife cheated on him. He got booted from the house, had to pay her lawyer bills, she said he was a molester (she lied) so he didn’t get to see his kids. The topper was that he got laid off and couldn’t pay child support so he spent 3 weeks in jail.

    All because his wife got tired of having sex with him…

    If you are a young man and you are not aware that this could happen your are simply a fool.

    The court system is rigged against men. The marriage contract is as well. A man no longer is the king of his castle.

    To decide to not play the game by those rules is simply a reflection of reality. To play the game now, how the rules are currently is the height of foolishness.

    • Jonathan Gardner Says:

      RE slavery: Slavery sucks, and it is wrong, but if you find yourself in slavery and you cannot fight your way out of it, it’s better to learn to treat your masters kindly. So yes, even in slavery, you can find some measure of happiness if you focus your attention on the needs of others.

      You’re right about the position of power vs. slavery thing. Men should take power and achieve success, and then with the spoils or bounties of their efforts they should bless the lives of others.

      Our laws are extremely corrupt and the things that the MGTOW people are protesting should never happen. I would happily see anti-divorce laws brought back, the elimination of no-fault divorce, and the strengthening of state-sanctioned marriage as the law of the land. Children have a right to a mother and father the same way we have a right to speak freely or defend our lives. Those who wish to deprive their offspring of their presence deserve to be treated the same way we treat those who deprive others of their lives.

  2. Jason Gardner Says:

    “Men should take power and achieve success, and then with the spoils or bounties of their efforts they should bless the lives of others.”

    More true words were never spoken. The problem with young men now is they want to jump in on the charity without establishing the success first. I would assume this is because it is easy to be charitable (especially when you have nothing to give) and hard to be powerful.

    First you get power, then you can afford to be magnanimous.

    To be magnanimous without power is simple weakness. It is not a virtue; it is a moral failing.

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